Lose face? What the heck is this?
Come on! don't pretend like you don't know it, just because you guys are hardly in this kind of situation but behold folks! This thing is really common in Thailand and maybe it's become part of the culture now.Well, losing face is feeling extremely embarrassed or being in a really really awkward situation... and that is what we, Thai people really hate!
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| Geert Hofstede |
First thing is, according to Geert Hofstede's Cultural dimension, Thai people has really high point for the concept of uncertainty avoidance culture, which means Thai people are afraid to to be in such an uncertain situation.
Alright enough for academic article... let's go back to the reality
However, it really makes sense. Now time to explain how we would be like if we are in 'face-losing' situation. Let me explain by telling the story.
In a really really lovely day after waking up beside your sexy thai boyfriend, you wanted to start your day by having the best breakfast but your sleepy boyfriend hadn't woken up yet. Of course, that drove you a little crazy but you don't want to ruin your day so you decided to wake your boyfriend up. Suddenly, when your boyfriend woke up with a really bad mood he shouted at you... well, your morning was ruined but you are really forgiving person so you were sweet to him and asked him to have breakfast together.Explanation
You and your guy spent a little time to get ready before coming out from your condo, damn the area where you stay, you couldn't find really nice restaurant to sit down for the best breakfast and you were so hungry that you could eat your boyfriend alive (I mean really ate him) but your day wasn't that bad, you found a street fruit stand where there were tons of watermelon, your all time favourite fruit. You decided to buy some but that fruit stand was surrounded by messy Thai people who didn't know how to queue up. However, you had an idea to get the fruits by asking your cute boyfriend to buy for you pretending you didn't know how to order in Thai.
As always, your boyfriend went straight in the cloud of those people just to order your favourite fruit for you. After you had been standing and waiting your boyfriend to get the fruits for you for a while, and it was not far until your boyfriend got the fruits for you, there was this wild Thai guy appeared from middle of nowhere and jumped the queue... your boyfriend's queue. You blood was boiling, the fruit stand became a small hell on earth and you felt like you were the reaper... that Thai guy must get punished! You ran to the stand and shouted at the guy and then the fruit seller because he should realise that your boyfriend should be the one who got to order the fruit.
In a battle of fruit ordering, your boyfriend happened to say something that would make you break his bone "Hey darling, it's OK. We can wait" In your head, it's all like "OK? Not for me! you are totally useless!" well, before you realised you had already said that to your boyfriend. Somehow, your boyfriend kept telling you to stop fighting with those people which enraged you more. It ended up that you needed to come up to your condo to boil instant noodle for your breakfast and now your boyfriend is 'weirdly' silent (if you still don't understand why he was silent then read the part one)
What your boyfriend tried to do was not to enrage you at all, I am sure he did not want you to be angry as well, but he tried to protect himself from losing face and he doesn't want to start an unnecessary fight. You need to understand one thing about Thai people, it is, we don't fight people while we are confronting each other but we will backbite those who want to fight with us ;) OR we have the concept of "sabai sabai" (living your life like there's no trouble) so whatever we can compromise we will compromise but for you guys everything should go on the way it is... no one should take your advantages but for us "it's OK" LOL
Now you know another fact about your beloved Thai boyfriend. It's never too late to apologize about what you have done ( if you have) maybe he would be surprised and believe me you will get the best gift from him tonight ;)
Have a sexy gay night!
xxx
Scotty
Hi iI recently met a thai guy and was introduced to his friends in a club. I was a bit tipsy and hugged one of his friends and give him a peck on the lips. Apparently this totally upset him and now he won't see me. Is this about losing face?
ReplyDeleteObviously, that's not losing face business anymore. It is all about being "jealous". You accidentally started a competitive war within him and his friend that you just gave a pack on the lips. Unfortunately most thai guys don't see it as a greeting, it is to "flirt" I am sorry that this is happening to you, how is it going with you handling it right now?
DeleteHi there,
DeleteSorry for the late reply. You are right. He was disappointed I had flirted with his friend and I wasn't 'polite'. We did meet up again and he spent a lovely week with me. But lately his texts has been a bit confusing. He's loving at times and distant at times. Maybe he's losing interest as he is 25 and I'm 40. I thought of having a honest talk with him but I don't think I will get a straightforward answer as thais don't like to offend. I'm not sure if he likes me or not. I guess time will tell.
I guess he is playing "chasing" game with you. Like he keeps quiet with you so that you will show him more interests that you have for him. There are ways to see if he has lost interests in you or he is playing this game with you.
Delete1.) You give him more interests, take him to nice place, come up with surprise or do some sweet thing. One thing you should not do is to give him money. See if you he gains more interests after those sweet things if not then I am sorry you have lost him
2.) Do not pay attention to him, just play the same game. If he make an effort to have you back, he is madly in love with you but if he is not interested in you any more, he won't make any action.
Please think thoroughly before doing anything. I don't know your guy so I can't say what kind of person he is.
I wish you best of luck. :)